YES!

Planet Poetry

In my recent trip to The Planet, I decided to jot down a couple poems that really capture the essence of good ol' Flatrock. I would love your help coming up with more.

Pregnancy
Locomotives
Anecdotes
Nevermind
Everyone's
Tobacco

Pabst
Loves
Anyone
Navigating
Enormous
Trucks

Pudendas
Luminate
At
Nick's
Ergonomic
Thing

Palmer
Loves
Attention
Never
Earned
Touchdown club

Repeat Player of the Year-Woodhead

Thought everyone would like to know that Danny has won the Division 2 Player of the Year again. He is one of only 3 to win multiple times. And the first to ever be nominated all 4 years, finishing 4th, 2nd, 1st and 1st. Pretty cool accomplishment. To read more go to

www.harlonhill.com

Holiday Travel Preparation

As everyone irons out their holiday travel schedules remember that if you're flying, you can only carry on small amounts of liquid. This guy lends some good advice on the matter. Is Wieland in Germany?

New Years

What are everyones plans for New Years. I have to work on Dec. 31st, so I am hoping that the Denver crew has something planned is up for ideas. ...and that the rest of you will follow.

Whats the deal?

I don't understand

Latest issue of Fast Company, awesome magazine, has top ten or so blogs on the interweb. On this list, out of potentially 10's of millions of blogs, is 'I Can Has Cheezburger' . In short, (actually in long) its a blog where someone posts a picture of a cat doing something 'funny' and then it generates about 200 comments of people talking about what the can might be saying or how the scene should be captioned. As painful as that sounds they don't really use proper English...at all (or vulgarity). Its like some immigrant/ baby talk hybrid, that apparently everyone uses and finds enjoyment in. I could only sift through maybe 3 comments before I had to rant about this. I am mystified, aggravated, and feel sick. How does this happen.

Incomplete Thoughts - Ramen

What would be some great fresh new flavors for America's favorite meal under 20 cents?
-Shanghai Nachos
-Loaded Baked Potato
-Hazelnut?

NO HE DIDN'T!

Yes. He did.

Notes from the Fashion Show

I hope I wasn't the only lucky bastard to indulge on this social milestone this past week. Don't worry, I took notes. It reminded me; a) I can't see the end of cargo shorts and flip flops in my life and b) zona wildcat basketball jerseys look 'high-tech' for some reason.

c) They were bragging all week that they had more camera's shooting this event than the superbowl...they showed approx. 3 different views.

d) I want to be the guy back stage who 'queues' things up. Its really frantic back there (I'm not sure they practice anything, its like its the first time they've seen the script...how long does it take to change into another pair of underwear) and this dude keeps his cool, queues hot chicks for their entrance, and systematically queue's up all necessary gimmicks for the scene. He's the glue that holds this event together.

e) I didn't see Tom Brady. I'm pretty sure they panned to Jason Giambi once. He was behind that dude from n'sync. He would be.

f) My order of hot chicks and their performance level:
1) Adriana Lima (given)
2) Marisa Miller (this is somewhat surprising, as she is a rookie, and sort of, not a model, but
having seen her nude photos before...easy pick)
3) Alessandra Ambrosia- owned it.
T-4) Every chick thats from Brazil.
5) This random chick pulled off the street before the show. She ended up being hot, and
didn't make a million dollars per.
6)Heidi Klum, she's last because she a) hogged the mic, b) stole all the cool gimmick outfits
and c) insists on dragging Seal to this event.

g) The spice girls did a gig. They lost the only thing I thought they kind of had going for them; their quirky identities ala sporty etc. that I assumed the Brits ate up. Looking at all of their attitudes, its clear Victoria Beckham a) didn't know what exactly this event was for and b) doesn't need the money. They were awful, per expectations.

h) During the most gimmicky segment, they played that song from Super Troopers when the German couple got pulled over doing 150. This helped the show.

i) This show could benefit from one of two things a)fire/explosives b) nudity/pay-per-view. Screw it, they should be nude, and it should be free.

j) Speaking of cotton. I'm glad I don't have to drag myself into that pile-of-hell state Texas for the Cotton Bowl again. I still haven't forgiven big red football for at least winning that game. Texas should save their oil money up and buy something cool; like topography, or decent weather.

Addicting Time Waster

See how far you can fly the Paper Airplane.

Baby on the Way--Need to Pick up A 'Dad Thing'

A little help here. With a baby on the way in less than 3 weeks, I'm quickly scrambling for some "daddish thing" to do. Here are some ideas I'm throwing around, please help with any other suggestions:

1. Wear only tube socks
2. Tapered Jeans
3. Tuck in EVERYTHING
4. Just be a Dick
5. REALLY care about the Weather Forecast
6. Drink the same exact Beer for the rest of my life
7. Develop large, callused hands
8. Get an old favorite movie that no young person will ever care about
9. Not understand anything newer than 1999
10. Tuck undershirt into underpants

Suggestions?

State of the Union: Taco Johns

(Author's Note: This is Part 1 in a yet-to-be-determined number of articles where I select something, someone, or somewhere and talk about whether it's still up to snuff. Today: Taco John's)

I say without a doubt that I have been one of Taco John's biggest supporters since approximately 1985. This is when i first remember eating one of their delicious tacos, in Holdrege, NE. In 1995, when both skipping lunch for Taco Tuesday and drinking entered my life, my love for Taco John's increased precipitously. This led to a glorious run in the early 21st century that culminated with myself and other members of both Exit177 and Heavy Soul creating Tshirts celebrating "A Whole Lot of Mexican". It was the combination of delicious food, awesome specials, ridiculous menu items, and colorful personalities of the employees, combined with a gimmicky ad campaign featuring Whiplash the Cowboy Monkey from PRCA rodeo fame that really made me and others a fan for life.

About 5 minutes ago, I had Taco Tuesday in the Des Moines suburb of Urbandale, IA, and it dawned on me how much Taco Johns had changed over the years, but how the core principles remained intact. How they have become much more corporate and business savvy but still cling to the outlaw tradition of their Cheyenne, Wyo. roots. Here are a few examples:

1. Placards all over today were visible for "Nachos Navidad", which, if you are unfamiliar, are nachos with Christmas red-and-green chips and an abundance of seasoned beef and all kinds of other goodies. This is a concept so ludicrous I am not properly describing it. I'm sorry. It's like you are eating a big Mexican flavored wreath.

2. The corporatization of Taco Johns concerned me about three years ago, which led to me frequenting the restaurant at a low level not seen since before I had a driver's license, but I realized that now, every time I go to a Taco John's, the food tastes the same no matter the location. And the food is still good. How can this be a bad thing? It isn't.

In the past, Taco John's locations were very dicey and to go to one in a foreign town was simply playing Russian (or Mexican?) Roulette. Sterling, Colo. and Kearney, NE (with the Spaghetti Shop) come to mind as examples of hideous Taco John's locations.

3. Whiplash the Cowboy Monkey is still figured prominently in the ad campaign, as is their use of the song "Feliz Navidad" only with lyrics relating to Taco John's. It sounds like what I do to bad songs when I'm drunk: change the lyrics to things that relate to me. For Taco John's, that would be Nachos Navidad.

4. I've been to Taco Tuesday before, and their is seemingly a renewed enthusiasm in Taco John's. The stores are legitimately busy. In Iowa, I bet there are 3 Taco John's to every 1 Taco Bell. Awesome. People throw out terms such as "Six Pack and a Pound" and "Meat and Potato Burrito" with ease. I credit this to the corporate influence.

5. The menu is at an all time high. Ole's are being seasoned properly, and clearly rank as the best side at any fast food restaurant, ever. The Meat and Potato Burrito kills it, as does the Taco Bravo. The ridiculous dessert Apple Grande is back from the dead. For those who don't know, it's a deep fried, hard tortilla with apple cinnamon and cheese on it. It sounds gross, it kicks ass. They've added trendy items like the cilantro-lime steak taco and the grilled chicken burrito, and they are both good and suburbanite-approved.

Overall, Taco John's is on the upswing and has seen a renewed sense of purpose in this author's eyes. By cleaning up a little but sticking to the things that made it good in the first place, (this sounds like the Nebraska football program) Taco John's is clearly the pinnacle of Mexican fast food.

Yet Another Reason to Visit the Star City!

As if the National Museum of Roller Skating wasn't enough